The cruise mistakes to avoid are not the ones in the brochure. They are the ones that get your stuff confiscated at security, get you fined, get you escorted off at the next port, or leave you on the pier watching the ship sail away.
I have been on more than 70 cruises, and I have watched every one of these happen. Some I have made myself.
Some are about etiquette, the things that make you the person everyone on the ship quietly hates. A few will cost you money.
Number one will end your vacation. Here is the full countdown.
Mistakes 20 to 18: The Pool Deck and Your Cabin Door
20. Hogging Pool Chairs
You head up early, drape a towel and your things over a lounger, then go back to bed or off to breakfast. I did this in my early cruising days, so no judgment, but it is the fastest way to annoy an entire pool deck.
Some cruise lines now enforce a limit, usually 30 or 40 minutes, and some crew just let it happen. What I do now is skip the saving entirely: if I am committing to the pool, I bring nothing and go straight in.
19. Letting Your Kids Roam Unsupervised
The cruise is not your babysitter. I have watched kids under 12 take over the treadmills in the gym, splash in the adults-only pool, and a toddler on the dance floor after midnight.
I am not going to tell anyone how to parent. I will just say, kindly, that everyone else on board notices.
18. Leaving the Balcony Door Open
Open your balcony door and your cabin door at the same time and you create a wind tunnel. I have heard doors slam hard enough to hurt someone’s hand from across the hallway.
The bigger catch: on every ship I have sailed, the air conditioning will not run unless the balcony door is closed and the handle is turned to the closed position. Forget the handle in the Caribbean and you come back to a hot room.
Mistakes 17 and 16: Your Cabin and Your Cabin Steward
17. Drying Your Swimsuit on the Balcony
It is humid out there, so it barely dries anyway, and the wind takes whatever it wants. On one sailing someone’s underwear blew onto my balcony and stayed there for the entire cruise, because I had no idea what to do with it.
Hang it in the bathroom with the door open instead. Most cabins have a little clothesline that pulls across the shower, which I did not know about for years.
16. Treating Your Cabin Steward Like a Servant
Your cabin steward is a person, not someone at your beck and call, even when you have paid for a higher level of service. Be a good human. That is the whole reason.
My slightly controversial take: even when gratuities are prepaid, I still tip my cabin steward at the end of the sailing.
Mistakes 15 to 13: The App, the Mini Bar and Your Phone
15. Not Learning the Cruise App by Day Two
Spend 10 minutes with the app on day one, or ask a crew member to walk you through it. Once you know where the schedule, the opening hours and the deck maps live, the rest of the cruise gets so much easier.
If you can, poke around in it before you sail. Then the answer to where is this or what time does that open is always at your fingertips.
14. Not Knowing How Your Mini Bar Works
On most ships I have sailed, the crew takes a daily inventory of the mini bar rather than using sensors. I once moved every item out to fit my own bottled water, put them all back at the end, and was charged for all of them anyway.
Tell your cabin steward before you rearrange anything. It saves you a call to guest services about a bill for several bottles of wine you never opened.
13. Not Putting Your Phone in Airplane Mode
Surprise roaming bills at sea are mostly a thing of the past now. The reason to use airplane mode today is your battery.
At sea your phone keeps searching for a signal that is not there, and that drains it fast. Airplane mode, and the battery lasts the whole day.
Mistakes 12 to 8: Where the Money Goes
12. Assuming the Drink Package Pays for Itself
Unlimited drink packages are priced for a lot of drinks every single day. I usually could not drink enough to come out ahead, and on my latest sailings I skipped the package and paid as I went without missing it.
If the convenience is what you are buying, that is a fair reason. Just do the math for how you actually drink before you assume it is a deal.
11. Buying the Spa or Photo Package on Day One
On a traditional cruise line, the day one offer shows up like clockwork, pitched as the best price you will see all week. It almost never is.
On a recent sailing I signed up for a daily spa package, went back 20 minutes later to cancel, and later in the cruise they dropped the price. Another deal always comes along.
10. Waiting to Book the Excursion You Really Want
Some excursions sell out fast. The Grizzly Expedition in Prince Rupert takes only 100 sailors, has a single tour operator with a permit, and shares those slots with any other ship in port that day.
As soon as you book your cruise, look at your ports and hold the excursions you care about. Many can be canceled closer to the date without a penalty, so a placeholder costs you nothing.
9. Not Budgeting for Gratuities
On day one there is often a long line at guest services of sailors asking what the extra per-person daily charge is. It is the gratuities, or the daily service charge, and it is not optional money you will find later.
If you have not prepaid them, budget for them before you sail so they are not a surprise halfway through the cruise.
8. Not Price Comparing Your Cruise
I made this one myself. I always thought I was the savvy traveler who found the best deal online, and I was wrong.
Travel agents see deals and timing you do not, like a sale about to drop or an offer that stacks with a perk. Price comparing with my business partner JC and me takes about a minute, even if you have already booked. The quote is free, and we never charge a fee.
Mistakes 7 to 5: Health and Fire Safety on Board
7. Relying on Hand Sanitizer Alone
Sanitizer is not enough. Wash your hands properly, especially before you eat.
I have been on ships when a lot of people got sick, and early in the pandemic I sailed when an entire floor was set aside for sailors who might have COVID. And at the buffet, please do not lick your fingers and then grab the serving spoon.
6. Flushing Anything Other Than Toilet Paper
Cruise toilets flush so hard it feels like they send things to another universe, so people assume anything goes. It does not.
Mid-cruise, I watched my neighbors pack up and move cabins because their kids had flushed something and the toilet stopped working. Read the sign above the toilet and believe it.
5. Bringing a Candle, Iron or Steamer
Candles, irons, steamers and flat irons are banned for one reason: fire. I have had fires break out next door to my cabin, or very close to it, from exactly these items.
Everyone shares a very confined space. Every cruise line publishes its prohibited items list, so read yours before you pack.
Mistakes 4 and 3: The Ones That Get You Fined or Escorted Off
4. Smoking or Vaping Where You Are Not Supposed To
Smoking outside the designated areas can get you fined, and vaping counts. Depending on the ship, the fine is generally around $250.
I see people try to be sneaky about it all the time, and I see them get fined and call it unfair. The smoking areas are a short walk away.
3. Getting Too Drunk
A cruise can feel like one long party, and that is exactly how people end up here. On a cruise years ago, a friend of mine got so drunk he was banned from parts of the ship for the rest of the trip.
Argue with security about it and you can end up in a holding space. I have also heard of a sailor escorted off the ship at the next port for it.
Mistake 2: Packing Your Passport in Your Checked Bag
I met a viewer at embarkation who had planned her 50th birthday cruise with a group of friends. She was so excited, and she had brought a little gift for everyone sailing with her.
When I asked why she had not boarded yet, she told me her passport was in her checked bag, already on its way onto the ship. She waited 3 hours while the porters and crew found it.
The porters usually ask if you have your passport on you. Treat it like phone, wallet and keys, and keep it on you all the way through check-in.
Mistake 1: Missing the Ship
Almost everyone I have seen miss the ship got one of two things wrong. They read departure time as the time to be back, when all aboard is earlier. Or they trusted a phone that quietly switched to port time.
I wrote a full breakdown of both, with the snorkel-day math that catches people: all aboard time vs departure time.
Bonus Mistake: Skipping Muster
You board, head straight to the bar, enjoy the sail away party, then go take a nap. Meanwhile the ship cannot leave, because everyone has to muster, and you are the reason the captain is waiting.
Do the safety drill. On my 54th sailing or so I did muster, checked in and everything, and still got a note saying I had not. I had never seen that before, but it beats being the one holding up the ship.
Cruise Mistakes FAQ
What is the biggest mistake people make on a cruise? Missing the ship. It usually comes down to confusing all aboard time with departure time, or following a phone that switched to port time.
Can you get kicked off a cruise ship? Yes. I have heard of sailors escorted off at the next port, most often after getting too drunk.
What items can you not bring on a cruise? Fire risks like candles, irons, steamers and flat irons are the usual ones. Every cruise line publishes its own prohibited items list, so check yours before you pack.
Should you tip your cabin steward if gratuities are prepaid? That is up to you. I still do, at the end of every sailing.
Cruise Mistakes to Avoid: The Short List
Most of these come down to the same thing: cruising is not intuitive the first time, and nobody tells you the unwritten rules until you break one.
Keep your passport on you, budget for gratuities, read the prohibited items list, book the excursion you really want early, and set your phone to ship time on every port day.
Do that, and you will be the sailor everyone is happy to share a pool deck with.
